GEEK IS CHIC!!

A geek and his life(the happy one)

die liao… January 18, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — bennycan @ 3:27 pm

Few weeks ago I received this letter from MINDEF to report for a vocational assessment at Sembawang Naval Base  on the 13th Feb 2009.

Didnt though much of it other then another round of test to gaugue your EQ, IQ, medical/physical, physco-metric  level.  Since I am residing  in Yishun I assume that the army was kind enough to post me to the nearest base to do these test(which is sembawang)

last week I was in school for my FYP presentation

dsc014812

Apparently only a few of the guys got the letter. I was as clueless as them about what this letter was and why we were the few who got it.

Last night I was at Kian Kai’s BBQ and happen to tell my mates about this letter. Their response was with more gusto then me doing the chicken dance:

“HO SEI LIAO!”

“SONG BO!!”

“MATI LA !”

“HAHAHAHAHA!”

It seems like I’m most PROBABLY going for a assessment as a Naval Diver.

Those who have to report to Heddon Camp for their assesement are probably going to be enlisted as commando and those to Sembawang naval base assessed for  the naval diving unit.

I did a search and it appears that they looked out for three things,

-PES A grade for medical check up

-Preferably Perfect eyesight(diver can’t wear specs)

-Is a  human being

I fit the  above criteria. Dope.

My swimming skill is probably on par with that of a floating log.

So long singapore….

 

Boys will be boys January 15, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — bennycan @ 2:35 am

I have this friend who was recently caught by his girlfriend for having some pornographic material on his laptop.  He swears by the saying: “hell has no fury like a woman scorned”.

I do admit men look at pornography and me being a dude freely admit  I occasionally do surf porn. Any man you pick off the street would be guilty of that. 

 

It is a addiction  for some but in my opinion not as bad as drugs or alcoholism. As long as you do not let it control your life and let it remain in your deepest fantasy, I guess it is as good as a a gaming where killing innocent players is acceptable in the cyber world but in this case with pornography being less socially acceptable.

 

Going straight to the point. Like it or not porn is a turn on for guys, even the most honest and religious person. It is a habit many can’t kick. hmmm come to think of it. I have never heard of guys going cold cock  from  porn before.. I mean cold turkey..okay okay not funny…

The point is spouse and girlfriend should’t take it upon themselves  and use it as a reason to unleash hell on “him” because Men are more of a visual creature unlike woman

Woman on the other hand are also guilty of another type of porno. I do know of someone who reads romance novel day in day out.  She  was on it for days and I swear she was talking to the novel.

 

One day I got curious, picked up the book she was reading and flipped through the pages:

“His chest was her pillow, and oh, did she drool.”

 ”Her embrace made his manhood swell like week-old roadkill on hot asphalt in the Georgia sun.”

 

O god, you dun see guys cracking up because youre reading romance novel and fantasizing, Its completely normal and is a fodder for your imagination and might just be your ticket to escape reality.

 

Oyea I stopped reading the novel when I came across this line:

“His musculine finger throbbed as he slid them deeper and deeper into  my moist … nostril!!!”

 

 

**I made the last line up but honestly porn is not big deal as long as no children or torture/abuse is involved and he still stay faithful to you.

 

And that friend who was caught is definately not me. SERIOUS!!!!!

 

chronicle of Regeek January 8, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — bennycan @ 2:40 am

Went out with Huda, Linda and Derrick and we decided to  have our dinner at Fish & Co(The glass house).

Quite a nice place with live band rocking out in the background crooning to songs like Damien rice’s “Cannonball“.

n635600265_2277736_470

Just when the band was halfway through their third song, Cassie’s “Turn the lights off

The lights went off.

There was a blackout right in the middle of our meal. Well not quite mine actually. I am a pretty fast eater and just when the black out happened I was probably down to my last few french fries.  HAHA screw you slow eaters!! EAT IN THE DARK NOW!

 

Out came the candles and POOF! goes the service charge on the bill!

 

**I was bullshitting about the Cassie”turn the light off “, Probably some lame arse song they were singing.

n635600265_2277737_8491

n635600265_2277732_9211

n635600265_2277734_9889

I’m rather down on my luck recently.

I took my younger brother wallet by mistake and only realised it when I was about to board the bus.

I  boarded the bus anyway being the lazy arse I am.

10 minute into the ride/sleep I was awoken by this Purple looking shadow tapping my shoulder.

For a moment I though I was in my dream and  the soul of the purple paint I spilled the other time on the travellator was coming back to haunt me.

Rubbed my eye alittle and I realise purple shadow was actually the bus conductor. Damn dreams!

I remember him saying  in a blury voice: “BOY.. EZLINK TAKE COME OUT.”

Two things went through my mind,

 

Punch the blury looking man in the crotch and run the heck out of the bus!

OR

I could just give him my ezlink and stick to my number one motto in life “In times of great distress and gloom, just act blur.”

I choose the latter.

Well, it ended pretty short of an exciting story.  He took my ezlink, I closed my eye and pretend to sleep. He started to crosscheck the ezlink picture with my face. I pretend to sleep even harder.

Then he said”Ok, thanks”and passed the ezlink back to me and went off the next stop

 

 Part of me was felt relieved. Then I though hard. Damn hard. I almost wanted to press the emergency door button and pulled the bugger back  and say this to him:

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!!??

COME BACK AND TAKE A CLOSER LOOK!!!

MY brother

472967379l

 

 

 

 

And me

dsc00492

 

LOOK ALIKE   

  MEH!???

 

 

I think more handsome right?…..sob…

 

Looking back. December 23, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — bennycan @ 5:31 am

The year is coming to an end and this has been a hell of a year for me. A bitter sweet one.

1 Got dumped by my ex-girlfriend early august I think(this one dope)

2 Stepped down abruptly from my club as president, still miss the time when I dedicated most of my time to the club.

I guess I aint as great a leader and multi tasker  as I though I was.  Nonetheless I learnt a great deal from the seniors who took me under their wings and the juniors who supported me and dedicated their time for all that was worth.

100_1956

222

3 Sold off almost all my fishing tackles because I decided they were too much of an addiction and the hardest was to sell them at a total lost. My biggest damge was my  favourite set of rod and reel worth almost 500-600 SGD, sold it  for only 200 SGD.

Sentimental values and market values are total bitches. FYI Fishing was my life like lapping kidos is to Micheal Jackson.

dsc01417

dsc00330

dsc00115

4 This  fish tank which I poured blood sweat and tears in building was recently scrapped and given away as well.

dsci0010

5 Cousin Jeff passed away, God bless you wherever you are. Hope you liked the Subaru WRX Sebast and guys gave you. we’ll always remember you as you have been, A good friend with a sense of humour :)

On a brighter side

of life.

1 I’ve gotten a GOLD for my NAPFA:

Pull up-11(A)

Standing broad jump-230(C)

Shuttle run-10.28sec(A)

2.4km-11.30(c)

Sit ups-44(A)

Sit&reach-54cm(A)

That effectively gives me 26 points which is a GOLD, heck I even beat/match some of the dragon boat guys at  the various station.

2 Graded PES A for my medical check up.(Can I be the nation’s shortest commando?)

3 Completed the final phases of FYP except for presentation.

4 The girl who dumped me has finally decided to chase me back, okay maybe its the other way round but HAHA!!

5 Gathered enough courage to reject my manager’s offer to work at another outlet with him ( I’ve gotten use to the way things goes at my current outlet.)

6 Wash a Travellator for the first time in my entire life

7 Knowing  that I have friends around me from all walks of life with me.

From people I’ve never even met before to people I knew all my life. From collegues at work to strangers at pubs. From someone who loved me  to someone who hated me to the gut.

Thats life isnt it. You  destroy, you create and you hold dear to what you think you have.  You win some and you lose some.

Celebrated one of my buds birthday recently

Hidden among the shop houses along Haji lane lies a rather popular hang out joint.

Blue Jazz Cafe

n615860778_1590553_6512

One of the many "things" which fascinates Huda

n615860778_1590549_5356

n615860778_1590552_6233

Whats the rational huh Mel?

n615860778_1590542_3427

n615860778_1590572_2173

n615860778_1590566_336

n615860778_1590564_9733

n615860778_1590595_9774

n615860778_1590594_9425

n615860778_1590571_1871

n615860778_1590579_44111

After the birthday brownie cake we headed down to sahara for some beer and Shisha. Along the way the Lim yang yang girls wanted to take some pictures with the famous lovely lovable pillar so we stopped for awhile.

n615860778_1603236_1802

That was when something else caught our attention. Our very own fiery AH Beng. Pretty cool dude I must admit.

n615860778_1603234_1258

n615860778_1603228_9653n615860778_1603229_9917

n615860778_1603239_2651

n615860778_1590598_830

n615860778_1603241_3203

Simple guy, Heineken and Shisha. Satisfied.

Sahara Bar was the usual:  Shishas, Heineken to help chill the night out.

The rest headed to double O while me and Huda headed home because we had work the next day and I didnt want my work to be affected (so I though.. )


Well the next day at work  this was what happened:


photo313



photo317

yes, my colleagues and I are cleaning the travellator linking to the carparks in Causeway Point. This was what happened:

A customer had bought about 4-5 cans of 5 Liter paint and I volunteered to helped him transport his paints to the taxi stand at level 1(my store is located at basement1 ). I loaded everything on a trolley and went  to the taxi stand. When I returned back to the store another customer needed help to get his cans of paint to the carpark at basement 2.

With the empty trolley in my hand and being the thoughful personnel I am.  I reluctantly agree to help him. That was the biggest mistake ever.

I and the customer pushed the loaded trolley through the Sunday crowd towards the travellator. That was when shit started to happen.

Gravity & friction co-efficient decided to teach me a lesson in physics  by sliding a can of lilac purple paint off my trolley and down the travellator.  I repeated the word”shit and Mati” a gazillion times when i saw paint leaking out onto the travellator and tiles on the floor.

Kept my cool and told the customer to bring the rest of his stuff to his car while I grab a new can from store. By the time I ran back to store and down to the travellator, security guards had already blocked off the route and had created quite a scene as if Someone’s limb got severed off by the travellator.

Curious eyes were looking at me as guards were taking down my particular and asking me what happened. Being me I chao keng, smoked and Sabotage the customer.

wahahhahaha!

We cleaned up the purple travellator anyway.  It was as though the homefix team was doing some live demonstration with “Stanley” brush and scrapers and “3M” cleaning products.

The weird thing is that that particular model of paint was the  Easywash® range in Nippon’s catalouge.  Our normal sale pitch was that this paint can be washed easily if stained with it being teflon based. Talk about product knowledge now!

It was funny as hell. Looked as if Barney took a shit on the travellator.

photo316

Probably the first wash since 9 years

Look at the difference in colour, the top portion is the original colour of the travellator while the bottom is where all the dirt and grimes are.

photo314

Cleaned till about 12.30pm before the guards were satisfied

Did I say  I loved my work?

n615860778_1590547_4799

Off course I lub you abit more!

 

XXX XPP XLP XLJ XMT… November 30, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — bennycan @ 2:14 am

xiao pang pang Clara’s birthday was on  the 27th november and boy did we had fun.

8pm

Kian Kan picked me up and GX who brought along a weird array of items including  kites, banana, light sticks AND a humongos yellow  deflated balloon. We went to a balloon shop at J8 to inflate the balloon. He reminded me along the way to buy rambutans.

**At this point of time I though this brother of mine had gone bonkers from too much lectures.

Picked Nico and Leonard along the way and we were soon on the way.

In case you saw a giant yellow smiley face floatiing around J8 last week and though “HEY! courtesy campaign!” It probably was him:

photo285

The uncle was pumping helium through the cylinder and turn to GX

Man:Nah.Big enough?

GX:no! can pump bigger?

Man:ok

*Turns back and continue pumping  for few seconds*

Man: can?

GX:Uncle can pump bigger? I pump before and comfirm can pump bigger!

Man:erm. okay…

At this point of time I was pretty sure the balloon would burst anytime scaring the hell  out of people and   creating chaos while security personnel come running and pinning us down and detaining us for Weapon of mass destruction. Sadly that didnt happen.What a bummer!

photo284

Nico and I took a precautionary 2 meter distance “step” bad. If the uncle had another pair of hands, I swear he would be covering his ears. While paying for the helium the uncle mumbled something along the line of not getting lifted off the ground  by the balloon.

I swear I saw that balloon smile turn into an evil grin.

cimg4716b

GX, evil balloon and gang then drove to clara house in an attempt to surprise her but hey hey we met two mei nu/babes/pompun/murukus who gladly snapped away with their camera.

clara-birthday-9

clara-birthday-12

clara-birthday-16

Lao niang with her children she gave away many years ago

cimg47221b

cimg47251b

We managed to surprise clara who appeared quite pleased with the evil smiley face.

**The balloon tactic is officially added in my book of “chasing char bor

Why girls like these kinda stuff? I would prefer a balloon with -.- or a 0.0 or even  ( * ) ( * )

Hehehee

 

We went for steamboat at Tanjong Katong road at this store called paradise on earth, or was it heaven on earth?

Food was’t fantastic but the company was great!

img_0526

img_0492

clara-birthday-26

img_0499

img_0510

img_0529

img_0494

img_0523

clara-birthday-34

Standing beside someone who is close to 1.9meter was never a wise thing to do for me :(

O ya about the rambutans, we couldnt get any at the fruit store. Settled for its closest cousin, the Pulasan.

img_0535
Drove to east coast for the next suprise.

clara-birthday-38

No.This is not the suprise.

Remember the kites, Pulasan, Banana and light sticks? trust GX to come up with the following night activities.

clara-birthday-43

Night kite flying was a flop. We ran and ran and ran and ran but the damn kite could’t fly.

clarabirthday23

GX:Pulasan makes ojisan happy! 

clarabirthday341

The dirtiest and most authentic of all fruit cake:

clara-birthday-56

clara-birthday-57

clarabirthday41

I shall leave you make sense of this picture. hahahha noob la xiao pang pang

clara-birthday-611

The finale was a last minute thing and we headed to party world!!

clara-birthday-73

clarabirthday47

clarabirthday46

clarabirthday53

clara-birthday-72

clara-birthday-75

clara-birthday-74

Kian kai dropped me and the rest off and everyone went home happy about their age except for someone who just got older.

 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!

img_0540

 

Dim Sum, lei ho hum sup! November 23, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — bennycan @ 4:34 am

Countless of attempt to get the gang down together for dim sum ended in wasted calls & smses among the gang.Everyone were busy busy busy.

 

Well I understand because we all need to work for that extra income to enjoy a slightly higher standard of living. Money aint going to fall from the sky and we dun have a money printing machine at home either.
Anyway we consulted the fortune teller who looked up his book of constellation, stroked his magical glass sphere, and yanked on his magical wand.  Baby we found ourself a date where everyone will be free.

Took a train to farrer park where we  hail a cab.  When we alight we realised that infact it actually within a walking distance(about 2 streets away) Damn taxi driver!

 

Hong kong Dim sum.

we ordered Har gao(steamed shrimp dumplings), chicken feet, some spicy soup from hell, Guotie(pan fried dumplings), Fried yam paste, Luo mai kai(sticky rice with chicken), Chee Cheong fan(rice roll), century egg porridge, Fried shrimp roll, Siu mai(steamed meat dumpling). Pumpkim AND xiao long bao!!(little dragon’s bag)

 

**I actually took 10 minutes to translate the dishes.

 

 

photo272

photo273

photo274

thin doing the cha cha with xiao long baos

 

 

 

photo275

Pumpkim made Matt go mad.

 

 

image058

Pumpkim also bends Ben’s brain

 

It was the first time I actually put a  xiao long Bao in my mouth. I heard stories where you put in it your mouth and instantly you taste the best testing bag of meat ever.

No kidding it was nice. The soup base in that innocent looking white fluffy looking dough. Killer with a capital ler.

 

It was a friday night we went over to mustafa center to join the crowd.I though the pair of twin would feel at home since it was mostly indians who shop  there but they actually said they felt out of place. Then where you belong? chinatown!! Kampong glam!!??

 

Dalry and I bought ourself a set of Hookah or a shisha pipe. Matt bought himself a Tamil movie on dvd. I dun understand Matt Why can’t he be like dalry and me and buy things normal people buy?

 

booya mama November 11, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — bennycan @ 2:48 am

Napfa is in one week time. 18th of November to be exact.

WHATS THE WOOHAA?!

If I attain a gold or silver I get a two months reduction during my full time national service, for recruits who fail, they go through a 4 weeks Physical Training Phase (PTP) before attending the standard 9-week BMT. And BOY am I not going to waste so much time getting grilled in there.

 

On the 5th of november I officially did a trial test with dalry and matthew to see where I stand among the nation of boys/men/gays.

I bought a measuring tape from home and Matthew donated his handphone as a stopwatch. We met at the school’s fitness corner to ridicule ourself.(I was in slippers, matt and dalry were in long pants)

This was what I recorded.

picture1

My pull-up is beyond pathetic and I swear my arms spasm so hard attempting the 5th pull up that I could have pass as a human vibrating dildo.(so sweaty you didnt need lubes)

Clocking 13min40secs. My 2.4km crawl was superb.(I remember seeing a family of snails running pass me)

My days were numbered….

Ever since I entered poly, I discovered the joy of beer and liquor, good food everywhere. Mix that lethal conoction with food junkies everywhere. This leads to one thing. A not very atheletic boy.

Just like the old day when I actually did keep to schedule to study, I devised a sinister plan  to get myself into tiptop shape. 

My schedule was planned like this on weekdays assuming I did’t oversleep and skip school(ah the beauty of life).

8.30am-4pm(school)

5.30pm-10.30pm(work)

11.30pm-1am(2.4km run+ blah blah blah)

2am-sleep

I have been keeping to this tight schedule for almost a week now and I am still going strong(FOR NOW)

 

11th november 2008:

My 2.4km was timed at 10 minutes 40 seconds(beat that usain bolt!)

My pull ups increased by 1 count which is kinda pathetic but at least i wasn’t spasming in the arms.

Sit-ups was timed at 45++

Standing broad jump wasn’t tested because It looked kinda stupid practising that.

Sit and reach should be better but I had’t test my limits yet. 

Overall I did make some improvement!

picture2

 

One more week of torture and chasing china girls jogging around the park at night!

 

 

 photo266

 

go on and laugh! 2 months lesser 2 months lesser 2 months lesser!!!

 

melody November 5, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — bennycan @ 1:50 am

Beep** msg from wendy “Ben gathering tomorrow night…”

 

Initially was powerhouse then double O then  Zouk. Lo and behold we ended up in orchard coffee club for dinner.

n578876503_1374178_2236

Nice catching up with the 3 girls or whats left of W16D. Tracy suggested going down to a KTV pub down at boat quay after that for some “happy hours”.

 

 

n578876503_1374179_2653

 

Made some acquaintance. Jeff who pop by from the other table, offered me drinks drugged me and I found out myself in the toilet few hours later.

 

 

 

 

Okay I was kidding…

 

 

 


n564658794_957166_1791

n564658794_957165_1777

Duet!

dsc00983

Ziying showing her dirty nails

dsc00965

Ziying sibei dulan

We were singing chinese songs to the likes of Taoze(my idol), Gary Cao, Lee Hom etc etc when Cindy started picking songs like Flo rida- Low, Rihana-umbrella and more from Nelly and Akon. She turned the entire 3rd floor into a club. 

 

That was pure talent.


n578876503_1374162_3343

Sang and party like mad till 5am when the owner of the pub had to chase us out. Luckily he offered to drove the bartender, tracy and me home.

dsc00975

 

Side note:

Brought my measuring tape and with a stopwatch.I tried to gauge my fitness level with matt and dalry at the fitness corner.

Matthew and I should be able to atleast get a silver.

Dalry on the other hand… Hahahahhaa see you outside two months later :)

 

melamine melamine melamine lotion… October 31, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — bennycan @ 3:25 am

 

Company dinner and dance was held last month. I won 120 bucks worth of  ntuc voucher.

 

With that I could buy 60 PACKETS WORTH OF WHITE RABBIT MILK CANDY!!! and stock pile it. One day when I meet kids whom I cannot stand, these sweets will come in handy..Ooo sweet child o’ melamine

 

 

Or maybe I should just give half of the voucher to my mum and spend the rest on junk food.

 

 

 

 

My store manager is transfering to a new store in Sembawang shopping center and he handpicked me and another colleague over to fill up the slots.

Shally made us do this.

 

 

Of course this is good news considering me being one of the newer staff there, but the new store  will be much smaller and that means lesser incentives and smaller staff count(lesser people to kar chiao/di siao/poke fun)

 

 

My slong October 25, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — bennycan @ 4:25 am

Adios people!

I had to take a long break to put some school work back on track. 

 

Went into Johor Jeya to have some bak ku teh and then to jusco to do some window shopping.Louis was trying hard to sound like a malaysian that I felt we would get into trouble with thugs if we had stayed longer. Funny dude, Seriously.

I'm Hiro from "heroes"!!


Save the Yau, save the world.

Special needs people

 

 

Went down to bottle tree park after that. 

Nico paid for my 3 hour session and I got a new set of prawning rod as a gift.

Happy fellow I definately am :)

Thanks buds!

 

 

 

Later that night we headed down to Crab party. Got uncle peter to reserve a table with Zippin for us and GOD the food  was still FUUYOO!! song. Chilli crab, salted egg crab, buttered calamari, pork knuckles, cereal prawns blah blah blah.

To end the day uncle peter had the waitress made sure we finished up the half bottle of bombay saphire.

 

I don’t understand why. When grown men drink they go all violent and crazy but when I drink I become feminine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

WHY  WHY WHY!!WHY  WHY WHY!!WHY  WHY WHY!!WHY  WHY WHY!!WHY  WHY WHY!!WHY  WHY WHY!!

 

 

 

Celebrated Hari Rayah at Nisa’s house along with my surprise cake.

Rendang rendang rendang….

Courtesy of Pauline

Headed down to Whiskey bar after that for some drinks and Karaoke.

The fellow who makes the first ghastly face in the following picture is the one who keeps pouring my drink and whom I have to thank for getting me knocked out in record time.

I have no idea whats so funny...

I realize a few things the following morning after my hang over:

-I can’t hold my liqour that well anymore(was I even a good drinker to begin with?)

-When you are drunk it is very much like falling into coma except you can hear your friends laughing at you.

-Liquor actually does lower my sense of humor to that of a infant. I remember opening my eyes and the first thing person I saw was ganesh ,I just kept laughing .But then again when I’m sober I’m already laughing at him.

At least buddy remembered to give me something :)

Ah there there.. Done in a jiffy.

Having my one week school break but I will still be working my ass off..

How daaa how…………..